Haha sad friday..booked out late and i made some mistakes that probably lowered the trust rating from my upperstudy..ah...nevermind we all make mistakes right...i just need to learn from them. I'm not superhuman and don't have superhuman memory..sometimes things just slip my mind!

Haha anyway didn't do much this weekend! Basically went to meet few of my MP friends for dinner and after that minds cafe and bowling. Nothing much haha. Today spent my whole afternoon taking a nap *oink* *oink* Weee. I'll probably go running after this post. Once per week..is quite bad...so is my gym..but anyway i wasn't feeling well this week..stupid flu.

Anyway, been listening to jay chou's 退后 haha the lyrics are quite meaningful i feel.

天空灰得像哭过
离开你以后
並沒有更自由
酸酸的空氣
嗅出我们的距离
一幕锥心的结局
像呼吸般无法停息
抽屉泛黄的日记
榨乾了回憶
那笑容是夏季
你我的过去
被順時針的忘记
缺氧过后的爱情
粗心的眼泪是多余
我知道你我都没有错
只是忘了怎么退后
信誓旦旦给了承诺
却被时间扑了空
我知道我们都没有错
只是放手会比较好过
最美的爱情回忆里待續

Haha isn't it true that sometimes even if you really love someone, it's better to part ways at times because you guys are just unhappy with each other. Love can't last without having 2 hands to clap. There must be giving and taking because in the long run, the other party will feel unappreciated if he/she is giving in too much. For instance you have to keep accompanying your boyfriend to do something that you hate and he doesn't care about forcing you to accompany him or that she enjoys shopping and you absolutely hate shopping but she wants you to accompany her all the time. That will make you resentful won't it and this is in sync with problem no. 2.

Compatiability issues are also part of the problems. For instance, you can have a simple girl and a guy who has huge ambitions and wants to be somebody. This scenario is okay if the guy is loving towards her and does not become selfish in his quest to be somebody. Or if you're the simple girl, you must try to understand that sometimes he'll be very busy as he wants to chase his dreams...so you'll have to stand by the sidelines and wait for him to come back instead of resenting him for abandoning you at times! Also, if you guys don't share any common interests that can connect you then it's very hard to maintain it isn't it? There's nothing to gel you guys together and in the long-run it's potentially disastrous. No matter how much they say opposite attracts, i feel that you can have different personalities but you must share something together because it makes you enjoy each other's company.

Communication(haha i don't know whether i can do this if i'm in a relationship because sometimes i just like to keep the bad feelings festering) is important i would say unless the girl/guy likes to play mind games..then i can tell you it'll be damn annoying. But communication helps to work out the small problems from snowballing into big problems that'll cause you resentment. A bushfire not put out quickly is turned into wildfire, isn't that even worse? So don't ignore the small problems that arise.
A final point for girls alone...please don't go back to a fucking idiot who cheats on you. Get out of the safety zone and get the courage to step out of it. I don't know what's the reason for wanting to keep things stable. You're hurt and unhappy and you'll feel that you have no idea what to trust anymore. A sense of security is what makes you know you can depend on the person. If it's gone..haha i would say it would be truly gone. And guys who cheat just don't cheat once do they. They can say all kinds of sweet words like they "love" you still, they will change, it's just a one time thing. Please give me a chance etc etc and your heart will just soften. But still there's also the other side where the relationship is already on the downslope and you have to identify that unless it really was just temptation then...please don't do the stupid thing of forgiving..that i feel, you have not learnt your lesson. Heck if my gf was cheating damn..i have to talk to her about it first and see what's the problem if it's just cause of temptation then..i might be prone to just make the hard decision..i know it's never easy and it's all theory-wise until i am in the situation...so it's just my thoughts for now haha. Haha just to name a few points..i'm sure there are a thousands of reasons why relationships don't or do work..but i'm not Mr Love Guru or anything... this is just to all those lovers out there to ponder on keke.

This friday mini biathlon haha..350 m swim and 5km run...arrow everywhere from CSM. He's like a red indian chief. Shooting arrows all the time and does nothing for us except disappear after shooting us with arrows.

SZ is late for run and is doomed for the mini biathlon! Wahaha..3 more hours to book in...dang!

Hahaa!! It's been an enjoyable weekend...booked out on thursday as there was cohesion on Friday! Wahhaa...but these kind of things are just like once or twice a year? So i shouldn't be too happy! It's back to the 5 day work week which starts from 7.30 am to 6.30 pm. Haha..however, i psed my mp friends on friday night as i wasn't feeling well. Was sleeping the rest of the afternoon away. Felt like fever was coming and i was having a headache. I had no choice but to ps them! Saturday was a very very happy day for me. Keke just felt tinge of warmness coming out..every single second :) There's no hoping...yet! Testing waters :)

Haha anyway at night went to butter factory with my bmt friends...and PLEASE don't ever go there..it has poor song selection & tunes it way too loud + it's squeezy & small = nono for me! Anyway, i have firmly affirmed i am not a clubber guy heh. I prefer going to a pub where there's live band and chit-chat with my friends to catch up heh. Besides, what's with the big fuss over clubbing? It brings you cheap thrills if you are just there to meet someone, hook up or trying to relieve stress. You'll feel happy for that one day and next day when you wake up, you'll feel empty. If not why are so many people depressed? Haha..and isn't it kind of like a drug if you think about it. It makes you high but leaves u empty feeling and you want more of it till you get addicted to it. Nono..i rather have fulfilment with my friends which are more ever-lasting! Next Saturday outing with MP friends!!

Anywayz happy father's day to all..it's time for dinner with my family!! Haha..SZ is going to book in at 2300 hrs! That's in 3 hours time!

SZ is determined to get what he wants :)

Haha..okay i would say it wasn't a very fun filled weekend...no plans for Saturday but still my mom is back :D Except since she shaved, you can see all her white hair haha so it looks like she aged but she's still the same old mom just that she's as bald as me! WAHAHA. Okay la..but she looks healthier, probably due to the fresh mountain air and water plus nutritious food. She also looks much happier :) I'm glad she enjoyed it. Haha..but she's contemplating going for another 3 months in July but this time to Myanmar..although it might be quite hard to get in due to the current political climate...but if she goes this time, i think she'll be able to get the "light". It's basically some sort of light that appears after intense concentration during your meditation..it supposedly lets you see your inner organs...and as you get more focused, it'll allow you to see into your past life. Sounds outrageous? But i believe that there are alot of things that can't be explained or proven. Heh...oh well.

Sunday was spent sleeping and going out with the MP gang..basket everyone of them books in tomorrow and i book in today. They stay out i stay in. They spend most of their time using INET and sleeping(a selected few) and i spend most of the time doing SK...what is this...bah...1 year plus more to go...after Wallaby in late Nov time should fly...i hope! At least after Wallaby i have 3-4 weeks of off! So my Dec would be free heh...but 5 weeks in rural Australia? Not fun at all...but at least there's overseas pay to compensate!

Time to go for a short run!

SZ realises he might be over doing things and will ease off. Heh. Friends are still more important i guess.

Heh..don't know what's wrong with me..been feeling excited the whole day...issit because mom's coming back? Or is it due to other reasons? I don't know..but anyway i can see her soon :) It's been a good longgg 3 months...i wonder if my mom changed alot...who knows? What will happen if she truly enjoys her pursuit for true enlightenment and keeps leaving us...heh..oh well...i shall leave it as it first and wait for her to come back! Boring weekend except the triceps muscle on my arm is still aching..god damnned fats! Can't take the exercise! My triceps really need HELL lot of work. Endurance training for it for now..i'll up the weights probably 2-3 weeks later.

Am i getting over-confident and bluffing myself? It seems to be that way...maybe it's really true that i'm hoping too much. Heh..well back to square one? I have no idea what to do next.

SZ is still considering his actions.

Haha..tiring day on Saturday...i only had time for 2-3 hours of sleep...erghh damn disgusting the guard comm didn't plan the duties properly bugger..but besides that..the next day Sunday was enjoyable :) Lunch was XO fish slice noodles with dessert after that with my poly friends :D.

Dinner was filled with all kinds of food keke...fattening(hehe don't blame me if you get fat and need to go running)! And went to chill at liquid kitchen after that...haha reached home at 12 am? Wahaha i would say i enjoyed myself thoroughly...it was a happy night! Haha but CONCUSSED AFTER THAT!

Anyway today watched NATM 2 with the 2 of the JC friends heh..i would say it was pretty enjoyable...at least better than terminator salvation ahhaa! I PSED Benjamin for dinner..sorry man i was really too tired..i will make it up to you some other day...i was really damn shagged.

Ergghh writer's block!!! Oh well..i think i still don't have enough sleep..but i shall go for a run now...i'm getting FAT! Gym starts tomorrow and thursday!

And mom's coming back on Saturday..YES! She'll be as bald as me? hahahaa oops but YES! haha..that's so mean.
I wonder how much enlightenment she has gained..i have no means of contacting her since she has been in total seclusion...i shall wait and see if my mom has changed heh.

Sunday lunch with MP section! That's about it for activities..let's see if there anymore other plans keke..

All right booking in before 23.59!! Let's get it going on!

SZ is happy and is going to take things slow. It will take time!